Forgive me if you can, dear reader, for neglecting your need to receive frequent updates about my life. As can be expected, I've had a busy few months after the museum opened in San Antonio. If I can be completely honest here (which I believe I can, as long as I don't incriminate anyone except myself) there have been a couple of days that I've had to ask Google how exactly I should be doing my job. Having no precedent to follow, I like to think it's a savvy and thorough move on my part.
Me and a new friend at the Member Holiday Party I organized.
I had to do a self-evaluation last week, and --not to toot my own horn, (which by the way has incredible pitch and sound quality)-- I couldn't think of many aspects of my performance that "needed improvement." I can think of several people who could be gently coerced to go on record saying I'm pretty fucking great (their words, not mine). You guys know how pumped I was/am to have a legit job, why would I execute any project that could be described as "needing improvement"? I'm the person who has all the notes written on the white board before my meeting starts, the person who keeps everyone in the loop on all projects that may or may not affect them, the person who makes time to develop a rapport with everyone from the Executive Director down to the janitorial team, the person who's bursting with creative ideas, the person who one time came up with catchy title for a program and somehow has gained the reputation of a lyrical genius, and the person who asks to voluntarily run the office-wide Secret Santa. I'm essentially irreplaceable. So, how do I say that other people need improvement in order for me to work better -- without sounding like a jerk? Let me know if you figure that one out.
Being silly with some co-workers. See? I'm hilarious AND adorable. And that's indispensable.
This year has been somewhat of a whirlwind. It started out with me working both an unpaid internship and a retail job in Austin, living with my mom, and using public transportation out of necessity. Sounds like the opening montage of a loathsome made-for-TV movie, right? Well, now I'm writing to you from the comfort of my very own 1-bedroom (but sort of efficiency-esque) apartment in a semi-shady neighborhood near downtown San Antonio (does this sound like it's getting better yet?) with my very own new-smelling compact car parked below, which I drive daily to my job in a pretty museum that overlooks the River Walk. When I think of what I have accomplished, I have to be proud of myself, and I can't complain about work [so... ignore previous paragraph]. Luckily through all these changes I've had the constant support of my loving family and incredible boyfriend.
Me and Jonny Bear getting our first Christmas tree (residing at his apartment)
I am glad to have a job that enables me to take care of myself and requires me to be responsible for myself on a daily basis. In my opinion, there is no greater feeling of self actualization than living alone and learning you can provide for yourself -- on a physical and emotional level. That knowledge begets a confidence and openness that allows you to care for people in your life in a deeper, more meaningful way.
So, let me ask myself, do I need improvement? Absolutely. I don't imagine I'll ever be in a place where I won't need improvement. I could improve by trying not to compare the success of my peers with that of my own. How? By reminding myself that every living being in this world is a different person with different circumstances. (And that those bastards most certainly never post on social media about their failures.) I could improve by not taking people's comments or actions as personally as I do sometimes. How? By trying to work through my receipt of their message in a calm, rational way. (And reminding myself they have their own stupid problems.) I could improve by being more health conscious. How? By setting a goal of running a walk-run-dance 5K with friends in February. (And planning meals other than "clean the pantry" nights e.g. clementines, ice cream, chips and salsa, black olives, corn tortillas ... yes, in that order.)
Hanging with some pals, new and old, from my young professional networking organization.
I am always thinking of ways I could be a better person. But when the question is, does my professional performance need improvement? I will find an eloquent way to say I could work better if my creative ideas weren't tabled, if other people were as passionate as I am about the work, and if I didn't already do such a damn good job in the first place.
Happy Holidays to everyone! xoxo
